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Is your loved one missing? See our dedicated site with advice, a checklist and templates.
Everyone’s definition and experience of hope is valid and malleable.
Hope is a universal sentiment we’re told to hold onto, but hope looks different to everyone. At the beginning, families just hope their loved one will come home safe and well, quickly. Later, they might hope to be able to cope better with the not-knowing. Decades on, they might hope there’s resolution before they die so that the burden isn’t passed down. Their hope can be for their missing loved one, for themselves, or for others.
“The most effective way of managing this unique form of grief is to make meaning from it.”
Emeritus Professor Pauline Boss, principle theorist and pioneer of ambiguous loss
In 2022, we invited families who’ve lived with ambiguous loss for up to 45 years, to share the thoughts they struggle with, the ways in which they cope and their ideas of hope. With 44 loved ones from 8 countries, we distilled over 500 collective years’ worth of lived experience expertise into a set of 145 double-sided cards that put complex feelings into words. There are short, refined statements on the front with the longer form stories they’ve been extracted from, including the role and duration (eg. Mother, 12 years) on the back.
Addressing the challenges of a lack of access to counsellors trained in ambiguous loss and the fact not everyone is inclined to seek counselling in the first place, The Hope Narratives is a tangible therapeutic tool that allows loved ones to sit down in the comfort and privacy of their own home and explore what it means to exist in a space where they’re constantly oscillating between hopefulness and hopelessness.
“Words are the digestive juices of the mind – you have to put words to feelings in order to process them.”
Esteemed clinical psychologist Dr Rob Gordon
Family participants unanimously expressed profound gratitude for the chance to contribute to something that would help others. Because after a prolonged period of feeling defeated, and in lieu of being able to achieve that one all-consuming goal, people relish the opportunity to connect with a community, to share their experience, and by doing so, give solace to others. It was an exercise in meaning-making and some said a tribute to their missing loved one.
The tool itself has been praised by Dr Pauline Boss, it’s won two Good Design Awards for Social Impact and Communication Design, it’s been translated into French, Spanish and Swedish and families, missing persons organisations, psychologists and police around the world have bought this evergreen and universal tool.
Most importantly, users’ feedback has been phenomenal; a sense of validation, of being understood, and the notion of being able to survive because there is proof that others have.
TV NEWS COVERAGE FOR THE HOPE NARRATIVES LAUNCH
The cards bridge communication gaps between family members, friends, colleagues and mental health care professionals by putting words to indescribable feelings.
A set of beautiful, thoughtfully designed cards that validate and articulate complex thoughts and feelings.
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